Smiley Anders for Sept. 23, 2008

• By SMILEY ANDERS
• Advocate columnist
• Published: Sep 23, 2008 - Page: 1B - UPDATED: 12:05 a.m.

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Becky Williams says she now believes in the accuracy of Chinese fortune cookie predictions:

“Our house had four trees land on it during Gustav, and thus there is a lot of reconstruction to be done.

“We went to the Great Wall one evening for dinner soon after Gustav, and would you believe my fortune read ‘Redecorating is in your plans’!”

The wind of freedom
Terry Serio says, “My daughter Rachel came home from St. Joseph’s Academy last week and referred to being out of school for two weeks due to Gustav as ‘Hurrcation!’ ”

Baddest of the bad
Doug Johnson, of Watson, was the first reader to enter my Worst Song Contest, to determine the absolutely most irritating song ever written:

He nominates “Leader of the Pack” by the Shangri-Las:

“The lyrics are spoken badly (bad, bad), and there is motorcycle noise. Only a Head-On ad is worse.”

Dale J. Landry’s nominee is “I Write the Songs” by Barry Manilow:

“Although he says ‘he is music,’ I believe it’s more of a head trip.”

And Wayne Goldsmith says this about “Yummy Yummy Yummy” by the Ohio Express:

“It destroyed all attempts by teenagers to get their parents to take their music seriously.”

(If you’re not familiar with this 1968 gem, it started out “Yummy, yummy, yummy, I got love in my tummy” and got worse from there.)

Nuts to them
Martha C. says, “While looking at the newly formed ‘hedgerows’ located between the sidewalk and street in our neighborhood, Oak Hills, my husband had an ‘animal lover concern.’